Discussion about this post

User's avatar
Sarah Cooke's avatar

Exactly what I needed this morning. Thank you.

Expand full comment
Dennis Mills's avatar

I lost my first wife in April of 2004, after nearly three decades together. For more than a month it felt as though I had been torn in half. My normally very organized brain kept misfiring to the point that I was making so many mistakes while writing checks for household bills that I was barely able to write a valid check in two hours.

My company manufactured complex marine navigation programs, and I had been the primary programmer. As with writing checks, my gift for easily writing programming code was no better than my ability to write checks.

Many people do not understand the devastation of losing a well loved spouse and partner.

As a widower so many years ago, I can understand the widow issues you faced. As a man, it is not possible for me to fully understand the compounded issues you have dealt with.

But I am pleased to have chosen to subscribe to your "sweet dumb brain" and read this missive.

Seems to this old man that you are finding the grace and acceptance that leads to a bit of normal coming into your life.

As for me, as I approach my 78th birthday, I am so blessed to have met a woman who did not mind my occasionally calling her Anja rather than her given name of Mary.

We have been together for 16 wonderful years, warts and all. Mary is 15 years younger than me, but lovingly refers to me as a young looking old man, a phrase my intellect labels as an oxymoron, but my heart labels as love.

I look forward to reading more about your journey, young lady.

Expand full comment
15 more comments...

No posts