Despite all the experience that adults have accumulated, it's children who are the most wise. (Or, they cut to the chase.) Here's to a less dramatic (and more connected) 2024!
Katie, I loved your statement “I want to better connect with myself — to connect with the higher version of me — in order to better connect with others” that was prompted by your friend’s text. I just met up over the holidays with a dear friend who I hadn’t had the chance to see or talk to for a while, and we have the kind of easy relationship that always picks up where it left off. So, this quote perfectly explains what it always feels like to be with her - she makes me feel like I am the most myself, which makes me feel connected to myself, which makes me feel connected to her. And that is what I think makes friendships so strong and worth it to “work” to keep them that way, and also what makes it okay to let go of sometimes too if the connection isn’t what it used to be. Thank you for your insight!
I’ll just say what was said to me this week by the most unlikely of people, my boss. He said, “give yourself some grace”. When you are looking at who you want to be, remember, nobody is that person all the time. If you are that person in moments, you are that person. So Katie, give yourself some grace. You sure deserve it.
I hesitated to write a reply, but I’ve decided to go for it. Make of it what you will.
I would argue that you’re demonstrably not “strongly anti-Nazi, anti-fascist, and anti-racist”. If that were true, you would not be voluntarily giving your money/business to a company that is platforming values you vehemently oppose. You have made a choice to prioritise your own profit over the welfare of those being persecuted. And that’s fine - it’s a choice you’ve made - but you can’t then argue that you “strongly” oppose the values you’re choosing to finance.
You have also conflated two separate issues in your comment. It’s not about finding a platform/space that is hate-free (though that is possible). It’s about not using a service that has explicitly made a policy of platforming nazis. Given that most companies haven’t said “we serve nazis”, it’s quite easy to find one that would be ethically better - though ideally everyone would choose a service that specifically says it won’t platform hate speech.
There are thousands - likely millions - of people worldwide who do make choices that are aligned with their values, even when there is a financial cost to doing so, and it’s not novel. Plenty of successful writers are running financially viable projects on non-Substack platforms.
For my own modest part in this particular saga, I am gradually stopping reading and financial support of all writers who remain with Substack knowing what the problems are. I don’t want my clicks or money propping up this system. I’m French and my family’s lived through this before, and other Europeans are living through it right now. I’m not supporting a return of fascism, however indirectly.
Hi Millie, I’m glad you decided to respond and appreciate you taking the time to do so. This wasn’t an easy choice for me to make and I’m not entirely sure I made the right one — or articulated it properly. I know that I could do more with my actions (see my thoughts above!) and I will continue to look for ways to do that in 2024 and beyond. And I’m sure I’ll make plenty of missteps too. I am learning and trying to do better. Thank you for calling me out on that.
I will miss having your thoughtful readership but I 100% understand your decision. Thank you for taking the time to share it.
Hi Katie. Thank you for this wonderful newsletter AND for sharing the thought you have and continue to put into this dilemma. I respect Millie's point and choice, and I would like to offer my own, both as a reader and fellow caring human, and as a Substack writer. There are those who would say yours is a simple black-and-white choice. And while "Nazis, bad or good?" IS a simple choice, whether to stay or go is not. There are many ways to fight against the dark, and there are many ways to generate our own light. I tend to believe that the more points along that arc we occupy, the stronger our fight can be. Contrary to what Millie suggested (clearly and intelligently, which I admire, but harshly, which I don't), I believe you CAN continue here, for now, and be "strongly anti-Nazi." You have the right to give yourself time to consider how to do this. You're not hiding, nor are you sticking your head in the sand. You have the right to wrestle with this, publicly or not. You have the right to make adjustments through the entire range of "stay or go." You've already begun, just by opening up this conversation. Like I said, I respect Millie's choice to withdraw attention and funds. That's the response works for them. Swift, powerful protest is *part* of what gets companies to pay attention. But so is prolonged, nuanced discussion, between Substack and its users, and between writers and their audiences. Some might argue the opportunity to truly discuss these things, over time, in an environment of good faith and care, like this, might change MORE hearts and minds and lead to MORE powerful pushback. We can't know. The point is, in my opinion, the most effective, inclusive response to Nazis on Substack is ALL OF IT, the mindful staying, the loud going, the public call-outs, the private adjustments, all of it. For Millie to suggest you are compromised for not making the same choice they did on the same timeline, well, I simply disagree.
Asha, I couldn't put it better than you did: "There are many ways to fight against the dark, and there are many ways to generate our own light." Thank you for articulating that so beautifully and sharing your thoughtful perspective.
Being of a Libra mind, I am often able to see both sides of an argument. This was the first I’d heard that there were Nazi’s, and racists spewing their rhetoric on this platform. I joined up in Aug of ‘22 I think it was, because it was a place I could blog stuff and be followed or not. I just like writing. And to date, personally have not read these peoples hate mongering vomit in any posts I follow, or in any that follow me. Which is not to say that it’s not here because after reading your post today, I have learned differently.
It is a whole new world since the man who was elected in 2016 and covid.
From my perspective, for over 30 years I led an alcoholic lifestyle, I hung out in bars and drank with the worst and best of them. I knew some pretty low characters in high places and vice versa. When I checked into a rehab and got sober and started following a sober lifestyle, in ‘95, I no longer hung out in those places and not once did any of those people I used to drink and drug with ever seek me out afterward. They simply fell away from my life. Are there still those places in the world? You betcha. But I am no longer a part of that world. So it’s a choice for me. It’s sad there are these kinds of dark forces at play everywhere on our planet. They are like annoying mosquitoes at best, at worst they are as dangerous as hungry jackals. My choices are to acknowledge, but continue to play in the arena of “Light”. I have no control over how others conduct themselves. I only have control over how I choose to live. And hopefully I will continue to attract people like you to my substack who are more respectful and loving than those who would try to pull others into their darkness.
I have lived long enough to have seen and experienced much on this planet. And I just keep telling myself “These are really interesting times to be alive.” I only ask of others to follow their heart and examine their motives. If there is a platform out there “that specifically says it won’t platform hate speech”. I’d like to know of it for future reference. But for now, at 71 yo, it’s taken me long enough to figure out this platform as it is and I’m still learning. Keep being who you are sweet Katie. ❤️
Great post. I was brought to tears hiking with my husband yesterday because I realized that being the person I wanted to be was so much harder than saying who I wanted to be. But saying it is a start. I also wrote about letting go this week. I love the idea of burning things we want to let go of in a fire. Each New Year’s we throw things out the window/off our balcony. It’s an Italian tradition of letting go of old ghosts. You can read more here if you like. https://open.substack.com/pub/pocketfulofprose/p/a-new-year-a-new-story?r=qqbxq&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web I wanted to let you know I highlighted one of your posts right before Christmas. I chose five posts from the year that were my favorite reads and yours was one of them. Sorry to link twice but here’s the link to that. https://open.substack.com/pub/pocketfulofprose/p/my-favorite-things?r=qqbxq&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
Absolutely beautiful way that you came to find your intention for the year.
Thank you, Kathryn! That means a lot. xo
I am totally with you on the whole nazi issue. There is good and bad in all walks of life. 💜
Thanks for chiming in, Karen.
Despite all the experience that adults have accumulated, it's children who are the most wise. (Or, they cut to the chase.) Here's to a less dramatic (and more connected) 2024!
Amen. Happy New Year, Chris!
Katie, I loved your statement “I want to better connect with myself — to connect with the higher version of me — in order to better connect with others” that was prompted by your friend’s text. I just met up over the holidays with a dear friend who I hadn’t had the chance to see or talk to for a while, and we have the kind of easy relationship that always picks up where it left off. So, this quote perfectly explains what it always feels like to be with her - she makes me feel like I am the most myself, which makes me feel connected to myself, which makes me feel connected to her. And that is what I think makes friendships so strong and worth it to “work” to keep them that way, and also what makes it okay to let go of sometimes too if the connection isn’t what it used to be. Thank you for your insight!
Oh I’m so happy that you have a friendship like that, and that what I wrote resonated with you. Thank you!
Same to you, thank you.
This is really good and it is such a good and positive approach.
Thanks, Jon. Happy New Year!
Thank you for your writing - I am always inspired by your wisdom and compassion.
That's so kind. Thank you, Kelly!
Thank you for this, as always, Katie. The parts about 3-year-old parenthood and the whims of hormones especially resonated!
Whew. Two wild things that are mostly out of my control!
Thanks for the inspiration — I think being the helper is always on my list, but I never fully commit. Maybe this year will be it.
I’ll just say what was said to me this week by the most unlikely of people, my boss. He said, “give yourself some grace”. When you are looking at who you want to be, remember, nobody is that person all the time. If you are that person in moments, you are that person. So Katie, give yourself some grace. You sure deserve it.
Thank you. I needed to (re)read this comment today. xo
And I needed to reread it and then post it on my refrigerator, so I’ll see it all the time. Both of which I did because you commented. Thank you!
I hesitated to write a reply, but I’ve decided to go for it. Make of it what you will.
I would argue that you’re demonstrably not “strongly anti-Nazi, anti-fascist, and anti-racist”. If that were true, you would not be voluntarily giving your money/business to a company that is platforming values you vehemently oppose. You have made a choice to prioritise your own profit over the welfare of those being persecuted. And that’s fine - it’s a choice you’ve made - but you can’t then argue that you “strongly” oppose the values you’re choosing to finance.
You have also conflated two separate issues in your comment. It’s not about finding a platform/space that is hate-free (though that is possible). It’s about not using a service that has explicitly made a policy of platforming nazis. Given that most companies haven’t said “we serve nazis”, it’s quite easy to find one that would be ethically better - though ideally everyone would choose a service that specifically says it won’t platform hate speech.
There are thousands - likely millions - of people worldwide who do make choices that are aligned with their values, even when there is a financial cost to doing so, and it’s not novel. Plenty of successful writers are running financially viable projects on non-Substack platforms.
For my own modest part in this particular saga, I am gradually stopping reading and financial support of all writers who remain with Substack knowing what the problems are. I don’t want my clicks or money propping up this system. I’m French and my family’s lived through this before, and other Europeans are living through it right now. I’m not supporting a return of fascism, however indirectly.
Hi Millie, I’m glad you decided to respond and appreciate you taking the time to do so. This wasn’t an easy choice for me to make and I’m not entirely sure I made the right one — or articulated it properly. I know that I could do more with my actions (see my thoughts above!) and I will continue to look for ways to do that in 2024 and beyond. And I’m sure I’ll make plenty of missteps too. I am learning and trying to do better. Thank you for calling me out on that.
I will miss having your thoughtful readership but I 100% understand your decision. Thank you for taking the time to share it.
Hi Katie. Thank you for this wonderful newsletter AND for sharing the thought you have and continue to put into this dilemma. I respect Millie's point and choice, and I would like to offer my own, both as a reader and fellow caring human, and as a Substack writer. There are those who would say yours is a simple black-and-white choice. And while "Nazis, bad or good?" IS a simple choice, whether to stay or go is not. There are many ways to fight against the dark, and there are many ways to generate our own light. I tend to believe that the more points along that arc we occupy, the stronger our fight can be. Contrary to what Millie suggested (clearly and intelligently, which I admire, but harshly, which I don't), I believe you CAN continue here, for now, and be "strongly anti-Nazi." You have the right to give yourself time to consider how to do this. You're not hiding, nor are you sticking your head in the sand. You have the right to wrestle with this, publicly or not. You have the right to make adjustments through the entire range of "stay or go." You've already begun, just by opening up this conversation. Like I said, I respect Millie's choice to withdraw attention and funds. That's the response works for them. Swift, powerful protest is *part* of what gets companies to pay attention. But so is prolonged, nuanced discussion, between Substack and its users, and between writers and their audiences. Some might argue the opportunity to truly discuss these things, over time, in an environment of good faith and care, like this, might change MORE hearts and minds and lead to MORE powerful pushback. We can't know. The point is, in my opinion, the most effective, inclusive response to Nazis on Substack is ALL OF IT, the mindful staying, the loud going, the public call-outs, the private adjustments, all of it. For Millie to suggest you are compromised for not making the same choice they did on the same timeline, well, I simply disagree.
Asha, I couldn't put it better than you did: "There are many ways to fight against the dark, and there are many ways to generate our own light." Thank you for articulating that so beautifully and sharing your thoughtful perspective.
Hi Katie,
Being of a Libra mind, I am often able to see both sides of an argument. This was the first I’d heard that there were Nazi’s, and racists spewing their rhetoric on this platform. I joined up in Aug of ‘22 I think it was, because it was a place I could blog stuff and be followed or not. I just like writing. And to date, personally have not read these peoples hate mongering vomit in any posts I follow, or in any that follow me. Which is not to say that it’s not here because after reading your post today, I have learned differently.
It is a whole new world since the man who was elected in 2016 and covid.
From my perspective, for over 30 years I led an alcoholic lifestyle, I hung out in bars and drank with the worst and best of them. I knew some pretty low characters in high places and vice versa. When I checked into a rehab and got sober and started following a sober lifestyle, in ‘95, I no longer hung out in those places and not once did any of those people I used to drink and drug with ever seek me out afterward. They simply fell away from my life. Are there still those places in the world? You betcha. But I am no longer a part of that world. So it’s a choice for me. It’s sad there are these kinds of dark forces at play everywhere on our planet. They are like annoying mosquitoes at best, at worst they are as dangerous as hungry jackals. My choices are to acknowledge, but continue to play in the arena of “Light”. I have no control over how others conduct themselves. I only have control over how I choose to live. And hopefully I will continue to attract people like you to my substack who are more respectful and loving than those who would try to pull others into their darkness.
I have lived long enough to have seen and experienced much on this planet. And I just keep telling myself “These are really interesting times to be alive.” I only ask of others to follow their heart and examine their motives. If there is a platform out there “that specifically says it won’t platform hate speech”. I’d like to know of it for future reference. But for now, at 71 yo, it’s taken me long enough to figure out this platform as it is and I’m still learning. Keep being who you are sweet Katie. ❤️
Thank you for being part of this community, Gail.
Great post. I was brought to tears hiking with my husband yesterday because I realized that being the person I wanted to be was so much harder than saying who I wanted to be. But saying it is a start. I also wrote about letting go this week. I love the idea of burning things we want to let go of in a fire. Each New Year’s we throw things out the window/off our balcony. It’s an Italian tradition of letting go of old ghosts. You can read more here if you like. https://open.substack.com/pub/pocketfulofprose/p/a-new-year-a-new-story?r=qqbxq&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web I wanted to let you know I highlighted one of your posts right before Christmas. I chose five posts from the year that were my favorite reads and yours was one of them. Sorry to link twice but here’s the link to that. https://open.substack.com/pub/pocketfulofprose/p/my-favorite-things?r=qqbxq&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
Happy New Year Katie! May 2024 bring lots of beautiful connections. And thank you for always being kind to me and Val Thinks. :)