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Hannah Iris's avatar

Boy does this one resonate. And it's interesting, because I too am high-achieving, Type A, perfectionist ... except, I'm not? Like, I am in all kinds of ways, but it's ultimately a learned survival strategy for all of us. But *at my core* I'm a lazy sloth. I will sloth all day every day given the chance. And so the scheduling strategies that I also use, for me, help not to just contain overwork, but also to give my poor sloth-like self some much needed direction and structure. NOW is when you stretch. NOW is when you do your kegels. NOW is when you read. NOW is when you rest. 🦥

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

I’m so glad it resonated! And I love your sloth-self 🦥

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AllieK's avatar

I'm also a lunch reader! Started doing it at my office job 10 years ago (maybe before then, I don't remember) and still doing it now that I work remotely. People knew not to bug me when I had a book out. It's often my favorite time of day.

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

It’s such a good reset!

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m. de mingo's avatar

I loved this piece so much, Katie! and it awes me that life lessons, even though marked by the particularities of our individual lives, are also a collective learning experience. I say this because you put into words something I'm experiencing right now. making the time to live the life I want and prioritizing what's important to me outside of work. it's not easy and you feel like you're going against the current, but it's definitely worth it. thank you for writing this!

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

That means a lot. Thank you!

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Val Saksornchai's avatar

Contrary to what you're doing, and this is difficult for me, I'm resolved this year to schedule less of my life, to leave more space for serendipity and wonder. I used to pack my life with lunches and coffees and dinners with friends and massages and time at cafés etc... all good things but I've now realised this was counterproductive and starving my life of the spontaneity and adventure I secretly crave. So for the past few weeks, I have intentionally left more space than I'm comfortable with in my calendar, and see what transpires.

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

I’m glad that’s working for you, Val!

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Lori Z.'s avatar

I loved this Katie. You really nailed this one. The life you want won't schedule itself. Words to live by. I forwarded that line to a friend who is really struggling with these same issues. I feel like it will speak to him. Beautiful. I hope your Mom enjoyed her birthday and a good time was had by all! 70 isn't old, tell her it's just life part 2. It really kind of is. My sympathies to Billy on the loss of his Grandad.

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

Thank you, Lori! I appreciate you so much ❤️

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Olivia Muenter's avatar

I love this. Also all the photos of lunch w/ books... SO SOOTHING! Also so many books I adored.

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

Thank you!! I also loved your ode to a boring life! Who would have thought that lunch breaks and books would be the dream?

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Paul Dotta's avatar

Ha! I feel seen by that description of yourself. We can get lost in work, call in "flow", but when we emerge we realize it was just draining us dry. OK, now to #1.

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

Thanks, Paul!

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RP's avatar

I really enjoyed this, being that I’m a recovering workaholic myself … I’ve realised that you can change your environment but it’s very hard to change the way you think and behave without a toolkit for ‘how not to be a workaholic’ I’m stealing this for mine!

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

I hope it helps!

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Emmette C's avatar

So many people resonate with this. Maybe people just love their jobs so much. If it is love, it is not overworking. I prefer to believe that it is love.

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corinne behnke's avatar

lunch reader ftw! I have also started my morning with an audiobook while I get ready for the day. It makes me feel like I'm reclaiming the limited time that I have as a working mom of two. Do Nothing by Celeste Headlee is a great book that pairs well with this whole topic!

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

I love Do Nothing! Great recommendation 🙌 And I love the idea of morning audiobooks!

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Carissa Mae's avatar

As someone with a more go-with-the-flow personality, I appreciate this piece as it allows me to peer into the life of someone who values more structure in their day-to-day plans than I do. Thank you for this!

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

I appreciate that! (My partner sometimes bristles at the amount of structure I value lol)

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Carissa Mae's avatar

Lol, and yet, it's our differences that make life so interesting! I couldn't imagine having the kind of structure that you do, but that doesn't mean your way of life is inherently wrong—it just means that it works for you!

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Rachel Torres's avatar

Sooo resonate with this!! I’m a type A planner and couldn’t agree more — the way we spend our days is what makes up our lives. When I plan well, I spend my time well. Of course things pop up and change constantly, but the game plan is there. Loved it 💖

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

Thank you, Rachel!

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Lesli J Krishnaiah's avatar

so good. Life here in LA is like that....let's get together again soon, and people are really non committal which has made the transition to life here, well, challenging. I think I wrote about it a few months back on my substack Experimenting Away in LA, would love to have you check it out.

At any rate, thanks for this really enjoyable piece.

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

Thanks, Lesli! Looking forward to reading your work.

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Mara Gordon, MD's avatar

A sense of intention about how we want to live is so crucial. ❤️

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Katie Hawkins-Gaar's avatar

Amen!

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Audrey-Olushola's avatar

When the procrastination/avoidance of truth is so strong I can’t even click the link…it’s not close to home; it’s in my kitchen.

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Chris Anselmo's avatar

This hit home. I am absolutely terrible at taking breaks. I can't remember the last time I ate lunch somewhere other than my desk. I'm trying to get better about carving out 2 hours a day to read, something I love to do but always seem to push off. I'm having some success.

Happy birthday to your mom! And my condolences to Billy and your family.

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