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Hi Katie. I love this lesson. I have been feeling an urgency lately to get through hard tasks. I often have to pause and remind myself that sometimes hard things take time and that is okay and the small steps add up. I wrote and reflected recently on keeping it simple, boiling down my tasks into what I value rather than a tedious list and this helps too. So for my classroom, I want students to read, write, speak, build community and feel loved. The details matter but sometimes they distract from what really matters. I love the patience you offer your mom through the move. It can be hard sometimes to remember the thing under the thing when moving through tasks and the thing under the thing needs to be tended as much as the task. 🌸

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Oh, I love the idea of breaking tasks down into what you value. How beautiful! That's lovely, Mary. Thank you for sharing.

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Sep 10Liked by Katie Hawkins-Gaar

Loved this lesson (and this series as a whole!). Each week is so timely to what’s going on in my day to day and feels like something I can immediately implement.

I’ve been getting overwhelmed with the prospect of actually starting my grad school applications and can feel myself in the familiar freeze pattern that has had me stuck for so long. Moving from the saying I’m going to do the thing to actually doing it has always been a sticking point for me.

This has urged me to revisit my to-to list (generated with the help of Chat GPT, love that i can use it to take on some of the more mundane planning aspects) and figure out what the next step is. Probably something smaller than “write a perfect personal statement in one go.”

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This is such a good use of ChatGPT! I use it in similar ways. It helps me to get unstuck when I’m making a situation more complicated than it needs to be.

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Sep 10Liked by Katie Hawkins-Gaar

Hi, Megan. If it's helpful, I'll share something from my therapist that's been super helpful to me. She specializes in working with our nervous system, and she talks a lot about how when we're in a freeze response (versus fight, flight, fawn), it's an invitation to move slowly, to slow invite and welcome a thaw/defrost. And so when I got to the end of your comment about the next step being "something smaller" (well, first I laughed), then I thought, yes! That'd be moving slowing! Thawing gently!

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Sep 10Liked by Katie Hawkins-Gaar

Oh, the timeliness of this essay! I'm going through quite a lot right now, in a particularly overwhelming season of life, and as I was sobbing to my husband on the couch just yesterday, he offered the same words. Step by step, one step at a time. Yesterday, I pushed back, crying, "I'm just feeling my feelings!" To which he responded, well, yeah, feel them now, and then, step by step. So having this reminder reaffirmed again today feels so supportive.

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Oh Hannah, I’m sorry life is so overwhelming right now. I had a cry on the couch yesterday too! I hope today felt a little brighter ✨

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Sep 11Liked by Katie Hawkins-Gaar

Woo-wee did I ever need to hear this today (and every day), or so it seems sometimes. I experience the same thing, and have passed the point of feeling bad about it or berating myself. It just is. I remind myself that I'm not that....(fill in the blank). I remember to pause, give myself the grace I need, and despite the mental butt whooping I probably just gave myself I tell myself to shut it and I go for a swim. The earth will not stop rotating on its axis if I don't mop the floor. :/

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Amen! I love this attitude, Lori. I'm so glad this resonated.

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Sep 10Liked by Katie Hawkins-Gaar

This is such a wonderful piece. So well written and candid.

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You’re so kind, Jon!

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Sep 10Liked by Katie Hawkins-Gaar

Just what I needed to read while typing one handed with a baby in the other. 💛

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Overwhelm indeed! I remember those days so clearly.

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What a beautiful piece. I absolutely related to the overwhelming aspect as this happened recently when I daunted myself thinking how behind I am to the things I have pictured for myself in the future.

And it became so distressing that I had to take refuge with one of my close friends and alongside I ended up visiting and staying at a local temple for some time.

I realize, sometimes we get panic attacks and at those times, it’s good to have friends whom you can reach out physically. (Not remotely - in my case that didn’t help much, but physically being present is super super helpful)

Also I have realized that having the right philosophy for life is important. As in, if that is not ingested then that means you have wrong or sectional philosophy in the head. Mind can never remain in vacuum. Hence I have started studying Bhagavad Gita daily, as my life’s pocketbook.

Best

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Thank you, Abhijeet! I really appreciate the reminder of how much physical closeness helps. Sometimes I forget that. I am glad you found some comfort and peace!

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Oh how I can relate to this. I moved my parents into separate homes last year due to my dad's dementia. I've just started writing about this, including the actual move. So tough. Thanks so much for sharing!

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