Happy Thanksgiving week, friends. This post is a bit shorter than usual (we’re road-tripping to Pittsburgh for the holiday and I’m spending more time in a car than in front of my laptop). In the spirit of the season, I’m leaving it open to all readers, whom I’m immensely grateful for. I hope you enjoy it — and I hope you get a welcome break from the screens in your life, too.
A few weeks ago, I was deep in thought, working on this newsletter at my neighborhood coffee shop, when a young man in line called for my attention.
“Excuse me, ma’am?” (I am still getting used to being a person who is called ma’am.)
I looked up. “Yes?”
“I like the way your earrings match your shoes,” he said.
I couldn’t help but laugh. I’m not sure what I expected him to say, but it certainly wasn’t that.
“It deserves recognition,” he added. Simple as that.
Soon, a friend joined him in line and they placed their orders. I went back to writing. I doubt he gave the moment another thought. But as I walked home, his comment echoed in my mind.
There are so many things in my life I do that I (perhaps not-so-graciously) wish I got more recognition for — the deadlines I meet, the essays I write, the many household logistics I keep track of — but I’ve rarely thought, “Gee, I sure wish someone noticed the care I put into an outfit.”
It deserves recognition.
It felt like a serious statement for something so trivial. It also felt lovely. Truly, it made my day.
So this week — a week of gratitude and glimmers if there ever was one! — I’ve been thinking about the other people in my life who also deserve recognition. Here’s a small, incomplete list:
My mother-in-love, Dee Dee, for finding joy in even the smallest things
The clearly harried person who still took the time to return their shopping cart
My friend Nicki — and any brave person like her — for starting a conga line at a party
The wonderful reader who sent literal hope in the mail (more on this soon!)
The kind South Carolina welcome center worker who hooked up my five-year-old with car bingo and a coloring sheet
- , for taking the time out of her busy schedule to ship a book, just because
Neighbors who take — and add! — books to my Little Free Library
My two-year-old niece, who now pronounces her own three-syllable name with panache
My mom, for giving me a place to land when I needed to cry
Billy, for fostering community where it didn’t yet exist
That guy at the coffee shop, for noticing my coordinated earrings and shoes
My friend Christina, for so much — but especially for being vulnerable
My daughter, for reminding me to slow down
You, for subscribing to this newsletter and reading this sweet and silly list
It’s one thing to give thanks for these things. It’s another to imagine stopping someone in their tracks and saying:
Excuse me? Yes, you. I see how much you care. It deserves recognition.
xoxo KHG
Having seen those shoes irl, I couldn’t agree more! They’re the funnest. I have really leaned into complimenting strangers this year, especially when their outfits look like they put something of themselves into getting dressed, and I honestly think the gratitude I receive in return brightens my day just as much as theirs.
Have the best time in Pitt! Looking forward to dragging my family through a lovely Thankful A-Z on Thursday in honor of a longstanding Friendsgiving tradition.
Hugs and happy thanksgiving to you. I wanted to write you and share what your essays brought to my life…Your honesty, your grace and your bravery in sharing & prioritizing grief and the long journey to healing. Your essays on mental health, love, children…the list grows as WE grow and bloom. Thank you for shedding & sharing a part of your brilliant gift in your sweetdumb brain. You always resonate…. And for that I’m grateful for you! Xoxo